Start acting like you're really sick and y ou think it's contagious? Like, "OMG, I think maybe I caught that stomach virus that was going around. I hope not, I'll be on the toilet all weekend. Want a sip of my soda?"

Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.
(attributed to
Robert J. Hanlon)

People with true credibility and integrity don't need to tell other people how great they are. They also don't need to belittle other people to feel superior.
(msmith)