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Posts: 2009
Nov 17 08 7:16 PM
koalio wrote: Thanks guys for your thoughts. It helps a lot to just get it out, but I'm still ending up crying at least every other day about my little guy. I just wish I could snuggle with my fishies, since that's the only animal companionship I've got. Well, I've got two rescued budgies but they hate human contact so no dice there either. Yeah the anger at my life is all that gets me out of bed some days. I still don't know what the hell to think about the ex bf. The more specific reasoning for leaving me was: he's not smart enough, doesn't speak good enough english (he's a chinese import), doesn't have a great job, doesn't make me happy, and doesn't satisfy me in bed. So, the smart enough, ok he's got a point there. I'm more intelligent than just about everyone I meet so it's not like it bothers me that he isn't a genius. Tiny little point on the english, but he's lived half his life in the US and speaks better than a lot of the locals that have lived here their whole lives. As far as his job, he works two jobs both of which he's had for a minimum of 10 years. His main work is as a mechanic which is something that he loves, and besides which that job sure as hell ain't goin nowhere! Yep he certainly made me happy, and he sure as hell satisfied me in bed. Admittedly that's a hard (haha) thing to do since I'm somewhat of a sex addict. The only problem was having a much higher sex drive than him, which I told him about my sex drive in the beginning and he was ok with it. Oh yeah and he admits to being in love with me, he just thinks I'll be able to easily find another guy. Honestly if it was that fucking easy for me I wouldn't be divorced and sitting around alone every night. I'm a very big girl, and where I live everyone wants a size 0 asian chick. So yeah, finding a guy isn't easy for me, more like rejection city because of my height and weight. Stupid dumbass crappy modern fashion/body type standards. Ok, mini rant over. Anyway heres a better pic of my little guy. You can really see the wonky hocks in it. Yes his leg did stick out sideways, his outer toe never touched the ground and the bend was getting worse by the week.
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