I read you post but I havent read the other replies.
I would tell you to just stop what you are doing.
Men react strangely to the pressures of fatherhood/relationships. Men tend to stay away when they dont know how to step up to the plate, as in when he comes home he doesnt know what he is suppose to do. Babies scare men. They dont want to break them, the baby chores are "womens" work. They just dont know what to do. If there is money pressure it becomes even worse and they would rather work 24/7 then face it. It doesnt mean they dont care, or dont love you. Its just a big adjustment. As women we have to be the care giver so we dont have the option of just leaving, in general. Just another type of Caveman syndrome. He must hunt and provide you take care of the cave and cavelings.
Things will never be the same now that you have a child. Thats just a fact.
I would stop pressuring him on the when are you coming home thing. Instead just tell him you know hes working hard for you and the baby and you love/miss him.
Imagine if he was calling you every hour asking you if you loved him. Do you love me? Do you love me? Do you love me? After about the 15th phone call..your going to stop answernig the phone.......

I certainly understand where your at. Stuck at home..., wondering. You dont feel pretty or loved or probably even liked. Your brain is turning to mush because you have no one to talk to, and you feel like you never go ANYWHERE.

Just remember you are beautiful, and you are loved. By that little baby. The man..he will either come around or leave but you will always have the love of your child.
Oh and the spit up.. wear it proudly.. is badge of honor!! You've earned it.