Here's my 2-cents' worth -- :D

1. Are all of a gaited donkey's gaits smooth, or just their running walk/rack/whatever that donkey does?
--It's going to depend on what gait the donkey does; just like horses, different donkeys can have different gaits. It will also depend on their conformation. Neither of ours are gaited but one has a nice, comfortable little trot (for sitting) while the other is rather bouncy.

2. Are there any good books or web tutorials out there on donkey conformation?
--Can't think of any; I'm still learning. However, the American Donkey & Mule Society website has some info that might be helpful. www.lovelongears.com/ Other good information sources are longearsmall.com/index.php and Mules & More Magazine www.mulesandmore.com/

3. Okay, saddle fit is not easy, I got that part. Is anything else different about riding and handling a donkey?
--They have extremely strong necks and if they don't want to turn, they aren't going to turn. They are VERY strong for their size. We don't use any regular snap lead ropes because if they pull back, they can straighten it right out. The bull snaps have help up pretty well. They are very smart ie. if they figure out that they can break the snap on a lead rope, they will do it again but once they set back and it doesn't break, they won't try it again.

Generally, if something spooks a donkey, he's not going to bolt off into the blue with you. They might run a few steps and then take a moment to assess the situation to see if they really need to expend the energy to run. A lot of times, they'll just stop and take the time to check something out first. We were on a trail ride recently and my daughter's donkey, Eeyore, was initially unnerved by the cattle on the property. He didn't run but it took him a while before he was willing to go forward and past the cows. A little later, we came on another group of cows and my daughter had trouble keeping him from going right up to them to check them out.

4. You knew this was coming. Is there any truth to the stubborn stereotype (not counting studs, I know enough not to get one of those)? Is there any reason a beginner like myself should really start with a horse as their first equine instead of a donkey?
--Not so much stubborn as having a very well developed sense of self-preservation. If the donkey doesn't think it's in his best interest to do something, then he won't --unless you can convince him otherwise. And outright coercion doesn't usually work. And even the best trained donkeys can have "off" days. I have a friend that shows his mammoth donkeys; some shows, he takes home championships but at other shows, the champion-quality donkey doesn't "show up" that day. Most donkey people will avow that riding and showing donkeys keeps you humble.:p

5. Would a mule be a better choice? Why or why not?
--A well trained mule would be a great choice. They have some of the donkey characteristics (mentally) and some horse characteristics. Of course, I'm biased. We love our three mules and will not be adding any more horses to our farm after the two we have.

6. How hilarious would the dirty looks be if I tried to board one at the big show barn my son rides at?
--Absolutely hysterical! And then be prepared to answer LOTS of questions. Where ever we go with ours, we get asked all about them -- most questions are just like yours but you'd be surprised at how many horse people don't know what the difference is between donkeys and mules. And the whole issue of sterility in mules confuses the heck out of folks, too. They may be sterile but they are not gender-less.