It was your too-big Affliction shirt, the fact you're a pilot who spectacularly crashed his Piper last year then asks me if I want to go flying with you,
all in the same breath. That you eat like a starving neanderthal who can't quite find the precise location of his mouth.
That you ask what my name is 3 times. That shooting a neighbour's pet deer is fun to you. Your air of unwarranted smugness. You are definitely not that
appealing. That you offer to buy me a drink and then scoff at my choice of beveridge because you assumed I would get some girly vagina drink. That you asked
twice in our 'conversation' why I don't get extensions, that I would be "even hotter and I mean that in only the best way" if I did.
That I got maybe 4 words in edgewise and it took you a solid ten minutes to realise I have an accent. That you don't know where Britain is. That you
think I should ditch my married friends that I showed up with and come 'chill' with you at 'Party Cove' because you know a guy with a yacht.
Yeah sure you do. You sir, are a Chode Master of epic proportions and no, you definitely will not be hearing from me.


