I am beside myself.
I can't remember ever feeling this... upset. off. weird.
I found out a very very close friend passed away recently. He was 65.
We were very close and though I hadn't seen him in over a year, he moved to costa rica to retire, I emailed or talked to him on the phone weekly.
In the last few months I've been really "stalled" and have "avoided" contact with him because I knew he would just "lecture me" on how to get things rolling again... I didn't want to hear it.
I emailed him about 3 weeks ago to say hi... Im thinking of you, sorry I haven't been in touch... etc.
I thought it was weird that I didn't hear back but he often has internet issues... chalked it up to that.
Well today at work, a customer came in from the town his (seperated) wife lives in. they still very much love each other but in retirement, their lives took different paths... She runs the "writers festival" in town and the daughter was part of it so I asked "do you know Jenny then"
Well... of course she did and her mother says... "It's so sad what she's going through right now" and I said "What do you mean"
She looked at me for a minute and then said "oh my god you don't know..."
Alec Died 2 weeks ago.
I never called him back, and I never made the effort to stay in touch. He still has an email from me, sitting in his inbox that I sent after he was already dead.
I feel sick.
Im angry. Angry at myself, Angry at him for being a stubborn idiot.
He got hurt, cut his leg.
he refused to see a doctor.
it got infected.
2 weeks later, his wife Jenny, was going to see him. He didn't pick her up at the airport. She knew something was wrong. She got to him and he was bedridden with infection.
She took him to the hospital, where he died 3 days later.
Oh. my. god.
Long story short...
he died. While I was too wrapped up in bullshit to call him. Or email. He would have gone if I had told him to. Fuck
I can't remember ever feeling this... upset. off. weird.
I found out a very very close friend passed away recently. He was 65.
We were very close and though I hadn't seen him in over a year, he moved to costa rica to retire, I emailed or talked to him on the phone weekly.
In the last few months I've been really "stalled" and have "avoided" contact with him because I knew he would just "lecture me" on how to get things rolling again... I didn't want to hear it.
I emailed him about 3 weeks ago to say hi... Im thinking of you, sorry I haven't been in touch... etc.
I thought it was weird that I didn't hear back but he often has internet issues... chalked it up to that.
Well today at work, a customer came in from the town his (seperated) wife lives in. they still very much love each other but in retirement, their lives took different paths... She runs the "writers festival" in town and the daughter was part of it so I asked "do you know Jenny then"
Well... of course she did and her mother says... "It's so sad what she's going through right now" and I said "What do you mean"
She looked at me for a minute and then said "oh my god you don't know..."
Alec Died 2 weeks ago.
I never called him back, and I never made the effort to stay in touch. He still has an email from me, sitting in his inbox that I sent after he was already dead.
I feel sick.
Im angry. Angry at myself, Angry at him for being a stubborn idiot.
He got hurt, cut his leg.
he refused to see a doctor.
it got infected.
2 weeks later, his wife Jenny, was going to see him. He didn't pick her up at the airport. She knew something was wrong. She got to him and he was bedridden with infection.
She took him to the hospital, where he died 3 days later.
Oh. my. god.
Long story short...
he died. While I was too wrapped up in bullshit to call him. Or email. He would have gone if I had told him to. Fuck
